Omg, I found this story buried in my Google docs that I completely forgot about. Warning, bad grammar and stupidity.
How the World was destroyed Made
A beginning
This tale begins in the vast void of space, there, a single Rockin’ Asteroid was zooming through space. It of course was not paying attention to where it was going, believing itself to be invincible, so it didn’t notice the Random floating rock minding it’s own beeswax. The result of this unfortunate collision was a large BOOM!!! and all that was left was a single floating core. This starts the making of the new world.
A Enraged Wife Makes a Difference.
After many years have passed since the making of the core, the chaotic eruptions that wrecked the planet, were interrupted by two aliens. One, a cowardly husband to the second and the other, a Boss Wife with guns for arms. These two barged in unexpectedly, the woman shouting threats at the man as they chased each other around the core. Whipping out her blasters, the woman started firing explosive rocks at the male, but she missed each time. The rocks all hit the core, making explosions of rocks suddenly cover the core, as each rock hit, the earth around the core became thicker, stronger, and larger. By the time the two aliens left, a uneven earth was in place.
WARNING!!! Globs are Combustible and Explosive!
The next occurrence came when a glob floated down to the uneven earth, radiating a radioactive light that made any who could’ve seen it uneasy. It floated slowly across the earth for days, until a random rock falls on it, causing it to explode water violently, covering the entirety of early earth. This is where the earths water has come from.
A New Life Begins.
The first beginnings of life has now appeared on the earth. These beings were called Seed beings, a race of tiny seed like things. The seed kingdom was a powerful kingdom, ruling land for miles. One day, a small seedling wandered into the Rock Forest of The Black Apple, a place the king has forbidden them to enter. It traveled through the dark rocks, unsure and not feeling all that safe, it was at the moment where it was just about to find it’s way out that it found the Black Apple spoken in legends. Amazed, the being walked up to that apple, forgetting that it was said to be cursed. It reached it’s tiny vine like hand out and with one touch sealed it’s entire races fate.
The Cursed Black Apple did what it’s name pretold and curse the young seedling and all it’s people. Instantly all the Seed beings fell to the ground and began expanding, roots formed digging into the ground, and in an instant, all the seed beings had become plants and trees of all sizes and types, soon they began spreading across the cold earth, becoming it’s wilderness.
The Aquatic Derp.
Not long after the growth a spreading of plants, a Derpy space fish stumbled and wobbled into the earth’s atmosphere, it soon fell out the sky and landed into the water, sinking down slightly. With a great Herp and an even stronger Derp, the space fish exploded stupidly, it’s remains that spread throughout the ocean soon turned into every species of aquatic life imaginable. This event gave birth to the many fishes and sea creatures we know of today.
WARNING!!! WARNING!!! A Missile is Heading For Earth!!!!
The next happening for this cold and freezing earth, was a crisis that broke it to pieces. None of it’s inhabitants expected the Missile, many didn’t even have a brain! But into the atmosphere came a speeding Duck Bomb, heading straight down to the mass of land. With a large QWACK!! The Duck Bomb smashed into the earth and exploded so strongly that it broke the earths crust into many pieces and cause mountains, volcanos, and many other land formations to come into existence. And from the remains of the Bomb came arial life all all types from the smallest insect to the largest flying creature.
Enter the Strange Mammal Thing.
The newly plated earth, as a result of the bomb, has began having many natural disasters. Explosions, Earthquakes, and Volcanic eruptions. And one day, from a volcanic eruption none has seen before, emerged a creature of epic proportions, we, to this day, call it the Strange Mammalian Giant! It stomped across the lands of earth, doing great things and make outstanding environments. But one day, it grew tired of life on this cold earth, so with a great sigh it laid itself to rest, and from it’s forever sleeping form came the great mammals of earth, and it was one of these creatures that gave rise to the next chapter of this frigid earth’s life.
To Which The Burning Star Rises!
As life continued to thrive on this planet, a primate with a brain the size of a screw dragged it’s butt across the land. It jumped into trees and feel of cliffs, somehow surviving each product of it’s own stupidity. One day, a magical cookie of yummyness floated down to the primate. It was impressed with the creatures ability to survive for so long with the retardedness of a rock. It told the primate of great tales and offered it one wish.
Sadly, it underestimated the stupid things ability to comprehend and it took a large bite into the cookie. Enraged, the cookie burst into flames, setting the foolish mortal on fire, then with a great screech, the primate chucked the burning cookie far into space, where in a grand display, it exploded into the sun… the stupid monkey burned to death.
A Show of Great Courage Gives Birth to The Cool Moon.
Large headed mice where a particular little race, large heads that dwarfed the size of it’s tiny body, it often could not even move from the weight of it’s head. The where the pariahs of the mice race, unable to do what most mice could do.
One day, a small Large headed mouse called LHM, decided that he will enter the Forest of Cheese in search of food for his family. However, try as he might he was not strong enough to enter the forest, each time he tried one of the stronger mice always beat him back. So he sat disheartened, until a magical cheese wheel rolled to him, it had wanted to congratulate him on trying his best and trying to face what he was known not to be able to fight. So the Cheese wheel blessed the young mouse and all other Large-headed mice, soon they became strong swift creatures and can now finally get the fill and place. So LHM dragged mountains of cheese to his family as the great cheese will floated into the sky to do it’s next job for this hot planet. It became the Moon and counteracted the suns burning heat.
How the destruction of the world began.
One day on the earth, a Big Butt Birdy scrambled to hide, it looked around rapidly before racing down the path, knowing it’s own end might be drawing near. It’s worst fear came true as a LargeMouth launched itself into the air screeching it’s war cry. The BBB barely had time itself to squawk! before it was eaten. The Largemouth roared loudly in victory and a full stomach. But too caught up in it’s own triumph it failed to notice the fall diamond shaped jewel, speeding point first towards the Largemouth. The small failure to pay attention ultimately ended it’s life as the jewel spear pierced it’s head, killing it instantly.
Only a few minutes have passed since the Largemouth was killed, and the jewel embedded in it’s head began to glow softly. Soon it grew brighter and brighter, and with a violent pulse it spread a ring of light across the earth that all it’s inhabitants must of felt. In a reaction to the light, three spots across the earth began glowing, before large orbs of light burst free from the earth’s form, shooting across the sky in a brilliant display.
Next, each orb of light merged with the glowing body of the Largemouth, merging with the jewel also. In a display that would have amazed any that witnessed it, the body lifted off the ground and and started to change shape and split into two. The two lights lowered to the ground and dimmed, leaving only two humans, a man and a woman in it’s wake. “Honey, Lets mow down all these trees and kill lots of animals, maybe even mess up this beautiful earth as well.” And the destruction of the world began.
FIN
Subject: How the world was Made - Stupid version 
