Don't Lose This One

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The last time he had to visit the guildmaster, it was not a typical one. He had to report the death of a teammate, Linus. He always tried to keep his mind off of it, but he never could shake the guilt of it. Linus was specifically assigned to him for his experience and Acro let both him and the guildmaster down. She was a kind archeops, but he couldn't help but feel as if she hid her immeasurable disappointment from him. Was she even going to let him add another to his team?

He showed Dusk the way to the quarters of Aeliana. He couldn't stop his nerves from tearing away at him. "Th-this is it." Great, his stutter was acting up again. He swallowed as he recomposed himself. The last thing he wanted to do was make Dusk uncomfortable. He gestured towards the door with a wing as he shuffled his feet a little. "Are you ready?" he asked as he decided to give her one last chance to back out...if he wanted to.

Dusk marched as fast as she could while still trying to pretend to "walk." She needed to get somewhere private, and then everything would be fine. This goal was what she focused on to keep herself moving and stop from breaking down in the middle of the hall. She had no idea if Acro was following her or not, and she didn't dare break her focus from her mission long enough to check. When she finally reached the sleeping quarters, she stopped and realized something very important...

She had no idea which room was Acro's. Fortunately, he was still following her; she glanced back at him as she stood awkwardly in the hall, hoping he would realize she needed directions. She stared at the ground as she waited for him to say something, not wanting to speak or even look at him. All she needed was to get to his room so that she wouldn't have to worry. Her head was beginning to spin, making her feel even more impatient, but she tried desperately to retain her composure. If she couldn't even hold herself together for a few minutes in public then how was she supposed to function at all, let alone be a guild member?

Something was up wasn't it? She went a lot faster than her normal pace and she made a direct bee-line to the guild sleeping quarters. He wasn't sure what to do, but he at the very least understood her silent plea for directions.

"Over this way," He spoke as he led her towards the back of the hall. Second door on the left from the back, the door swung open wide for her to walk in. There were two nests and several filing cabinets inside. Over all, it looked pretty cozy. The counter tops were refined marble rather than the polished wood of Grassveil's style. One nest looked rather used while the other...not so much.

There was plenty of spaces for items, each one of them organized for easy access. Seeds in one place, orbs in another, and the typical explorer essentials like Escape Orbs and Reviver Seeds all on their own. There was very little personalized decor in the room, seeing as Acro was always too afraid to change anything in fear of being criticized. He stepped aside with the door ajar, not too sure what to expect and a little nervous about what she might say...since last time he brought someone in here they said it looked like a gaudy wreck...and that person's dead now.

Dusk followed along silently and barely even gave the archeops time to step aside before walking into the room. She paid no attention to anything inside except how to get as far away from the doorway as possible. She sulked silently into the corner and closed her eyes, trying to separate herself from the world as much as possible, and began breathing in a rhythmic, almost robotic fashion. Her tail curled around her body as she sat idly and silently in the corner of the room, an occasional shiver escaping her form. The markings on the cloak continued to glow eerily, not that she could see that or cared at the moment.

She opened her mouth to speak, but felt her throat tighten and immediately gave up. She would just need to sit here for a while and find a way to calm herself down. She could control herself. She had to control herself. She would have to leave this room eventually, so she would need to learn how to keep herself calm. She had always been a bit temperamental and more than a bit bold, and her impulse control was never the greatest, but the effects of the cloak... made all of that a thousand times worse. It made her previous troubles seem trivial. Every second she tried in vain to suppress it made her efforts feel more and more in vain.

The archeops said nothing as he closed the door behind him. It almost felt like he shouldn't be here, that he should just leave her be...but the part that told him "No, you fucking idiot." was even bigger. The way she moved and the way she took a bee-line straight for the corner made it very clear that yes, something was wrong.

He wasn't sure what he should do, but he was almost certain that leaving her around wasn't the proper answer. Then again, every one else he tried to "help" either left or died. If he got it wrong here, at least it would be the former and not the latter.

He approached the corner she holed herself up in, careful to leave an open space for her to leave through if she wanted so she might not feel absolutely cornered. It was kind of hard to prevent himself from towering over her, so the most he could do was sit down. He hesitated, but eventually, he would bring up an important question, "Do...you want a hug?" It was probably silly to ask. Really silly. It sounded almost like he were a child, but he could remember how much better he felt after hugging Sova after that rather traumatic day in Shadowhue...maybe that's what Dusk needed right now?

Of course, her answer was no. She was fine...well that was a filthy lie. He wasn't at all sure if he was doing the right thing or if he was just about to make things worse...buuuut he would try to scrape her off the wall and pull her into one anyways.

It hadn't been long that Dusk had been left to wallow in the corner in silence, but to her it felt like a while. Time seemed to slow down until her spiral was suddenly broken by Acro's voice. He was asking if she... wanted a hug. It took a moment for her to get the words out, but her response was a distinct "No." After another moment's silence, she added on, "I-I'm fine..."

Of course, he didn't seem to believe her, probably because how obvious the lie was. She was definitely not fine. She couldn't even look at him, let alone convince him she was alright when she clearly wasn't. When she felt his feathers brush against her, she instinctively tried to retreat away, only to press herself futilly against the corner she'd put herself in. Her body tensed as she bared her teeth, her second reflex being to attack the thing that was touching her... but all that melted away as he pulled her in close to him. Her fangs slowly retreated under her lips as her body went practically limp. She tried to keep what little composure and dignity she still had left, but at this point she could hardly even think.

She began to cry. Not a sound escaped her, save for a single ragged breath as the tears rolled down her face. A tired look came over her eyes. She felt sad, but now she felt something new as well... Relief? It was something she was desperate to cling to. "I'm okay..." she muttered, although she couldn't even bring herself to try to get away from the archeops. It was very clear that she was not okay, and at this point she had totally given up on pretending, but she couldn't help but try to say it anyway.

She was not okay, but that was okay with him. For a brief second, he almost found himself wanting her to bite him. It was a sure-fire way to know that she was not okay with this and that he was overstepping some lines, but she didn't. He could only assume that meant he was good to go. In a way, he needed this hug too, probably not as much as she did, but it felt nice to know there was someone around that didn't hate you. This only spurred him on to keep hugging her.

She repeated that she was okay again, but her crying gave her away to yet another lie. He thought about what to say for a moment. He could let her know that he knew she was lying, but he figured that was pretty obvious. He could tell her that everything's going to be okay, but that would have been a lie and a promise he couldn't keep. He took a shaky breath of his own before he'd finally settle and gather the courage to say something, "You know...it's okay to not be okay...right?"

Dusk leaned her head against Acro as he spoke. His words managed to get through to her in an otherwise empty world, and it made her feel secure. However, this brought another problem to her mind... She felt guilty. She was keeping a big secret from him in the form of the cloak and how it... possessed her. "No... Y-you- have no idea... how not okay I a-am..." she managed to speak between harsh breaths, but refused to elaborate for fear of what he would say.

She knew it was wrong to keep the cloak, but she also knew she would never be able to keep up with someone like Acro without it. She was weak and would be unable to do anything on her own, just like before finding the cloak. But Acro wouldn't understand that... He would try to get her to get rid of it, if that was even possible. And what would she be able to say? By all means, she should have already been looking for a way to separate the cloak from her, consdering violent impulses it was bringing upon her.

But... then she would have nothing.

Somehow, his statement was wrong. According to Dusk, there was a point where someone could be so un-okay, that it wasn't okay. He, however, disagreed. It got to the point where he wanted to cry to, but he tried to repress it as much as he could. Not because he felt as if he shouldn't, but because usually he became an incomprehensible warbling mess when he did. That wasn't what he needed right now and that certainly wasn't what Dusk needed.

"I don't..." he admitted. He had his suspicions though. The cape's eerie glow unsettled him. His pendant was received from the same dungeon, but the pain inflicted upon putting it on was unbearable. It gave him the inkling that perhaps these things might be...less beneficial than he originally thought they were...though his was practically entirely useless.

"B-But...it's still okay." he spoke, "To me." He was getting choked up. No, he had to stop that. He took a moment to try and recompose himself again, "B-Because you're trying so hard, even though people keep bein' an ass to you. Y-You probably coulda joined Grassveil and do a whole lot better and been a whole lot safer, but you chose to go with me e-even after what happened with Linus."

"So even if you're a whole lotta 'not okay' o-or something, it's still okay with me."

Dusk melted further into the archeops' feathers as she listened to him speak. He was still being so nice to her, insisting he wouldn't care how bad she was... It made her want to believe him. She had felt so very isolated from everyone, like she couldn't open up to anyone at all about what was going on with her. She wanted so very badly to have someone to confide in, but assumed that would simply be impossible.

Maybe... Acro could be that? "Okay... th-the cloak... It m-... makes me... different." she sobbed quietly, "It makes m-me mad... dangerous... but... I n-need- it..."

There, now she had said it. She shivered silently as she awaited his response, expecting him to immediately start trying to force her to get rid of it at best. "I can't... I can't hide it... I thought I... c-could..." she muttered even more quietly, lamenting her own lack of will to just lie to him.

It didn't really matter. He surely would have figured it out soon enough. She didn't want to keep it a secret from him, but she also literally couldn't hide it. It was best to get this out of the way now and not lead herself on if this wasn't going to work out.

The cloak made her mad and dangerous. Yeah that sounded about right. She definitely didn't seem like the type of person to threaten to eat someone's wings when he first met her. He originally chalked it up to stress, but this made things make a whole lot more sense. Of course his first thought was to tell her "get rid of it," but of course, since when was he an expert on what was for the best? She said she needed it. She would know what she needed more than he did, right?

"Th-That's okay," he kept to his word. Well, it wasn't okay in general, but that wasn't what it was meant for. "You don't n-need to worry about hiding it around me." He could understand that it wasn't really her that was being so mean, it was the cloak making her do it, like she said. "I won't tell Aeliana a-and if you're gonna go t-too far or somethin I'll say something...b-but you were handling yourself back there."

Yeah she threatened to eat an Archeops' wings, but sh didn't actually do it and the guy kind of deserved it? She got upset with Aeliana, but she still didn't...do anything really? He wasn't aware of any other instances that he could remember, but it seemed to him kinda like so long as she didn't have to hold it in twenty-four seven then she could do this...right?

As the archeops spoke, the eerie red glow emanating from the cloak subsided. He wasn't responding at all as expected. His words were reassuring and considerate, and he even went so far as to agree not to tell the guildmaster. This surprised Dusk, since she hadn't even asked him for such a thing, but it sent a wave of relief through her nonetheless. She had hoped to be able to talk to him about this, but his response was far better than she ever could have expected. It was practically perfect, as if he had read her mind and given her exactly what she wanted to hear.

"Really?" she whined, still yet to overcome the tears. She was happy though.

The umbreon then fell silent as she attempted to calm herself. It was all okay now. She felt so much better... but she couldn't exactly just turn the crying off. "I can control it, I think," she spoke once she felt confident she could do so without blubbering, "But if I do anything stupid... I won't be mad if you just... knock me out?"

Surely, Acro would have an easy time incapacitating her. She was pretty sure he was significantly stronger than her, even with the cloak's added benefits. She didn't consider that he may not be mentally capable, let alone willing, but she was certain he could physically handle it.

He absolutely did not at all want to think about how he'd have to knock her out. He didn't at all have what it took to knock her down if she got too bad about it. Fortunately for him, another way immediately came to mind. One that didn't involve hitting her hard enough to potentially break every bone in her body. Sleep seeds and slumber orbs. Hell, even a warp seed might work just to get her out of the situation and go fetch her later...he'd have to go through his items, but he could probably do it like that...right?

"Y-Yeah...I could try..." he wouldn't make any promises. He knew he only had a single slumber orb but he didn't know how many sleep seeds he had in stock. Why didn't he ever hang onto his items more often? He began to calm down himself, but that pit of dread was still fresh in his mind. If Dusk wasn't going to leave and she wasn't going to die...did that just mean she was just going to perpetually suffer?

...He was going to need to move the sleeping items into the essentials cabinet.

He could try. He didn't sound overly confident, but the reassurance was enough. Dusk sighed in relief, not knowing what to say in response. Really, she hardly knew Acro and he had no obligation to be so considerate toward her, let alone try to help her. It made her feel a bit bad, but that little feeling was overwhelmed by a newfound sense of security. As long as she had him around, maybe she would be able to keep going after all.

"Okay..." she finally spoke after a long silence. There wasn't much she could think to say, and she was honesty enjoying just... being hugged.

But, it was probably getting a bit excessive and they would have to stop evenntually. Her tears had finally subsided, so she decided to speak again. "I'm okay now, really. It's just... been a long day on top of having the cloak... and a long week... and..." she trailed off momentarily, "I'm good. I've never had anyone I could... y'know, trust... like this..." In truth, she had never had any particularly good friends at all. Sova was perhaps the next closest thing and even he didn't really feel like the greatest friend.

It was probably a bad idea to enable Dusk in wearing the Cloak. As a guild member and team founder, it was his responsibility to get her to take it off. It was also his job to ensure his teammates were comfortable enough to not leave, keep track of them and not allow them to be quite literally torn apart. He always sucked at this job before, why stop now?

He relaxed the hug, but not after another quick squeeze for good measure. Dusk was free to leave if she wanted, but he wasn't going to just push her off or something. "S'always good to have someone like that around." he responded to the umbreon. His tail wrapped around his feet as his gaze focused on the opposite side of the room, the item cabinets. "Otherwise the world'll just wear you down until you can't any more."

Come to think of it, the last person he trusted like that was George...the same guy that tried to lie to his face about his parents being racists jerks for a few brief moments before just coming out and saying he didn't like working with him. It seemed to be going so great at the time as well. He felt as if he could talk to him, hang out with him, and be friends with him...Annnd he was wrong. So wrong.

If there was one thing he could promise, it was that he wasn't going to be George.

So peaceful... Everything suddenly felt... peaceful. The archeops had loosened his hug, but not quite released. Dusk didn't want to be the one to break it and risk ending the moment. Instead, she decided she would stay here, like this, for as long as Acro and the world would allow. This was the first moment she had gotten to not have to feel fear and anger and insecurity in... a very long time. She wanted it to last forever. "I... felt like maybe you needed a friend like that too," she spoke quietly, not wanting to explicitly bring up what had happened to his prior teammate... or how obviously depressed he was.

Yes, she wanted to help him, especially if he was also helping her. "So maybe I can be there for you too... if you need it," she added on, trying to make it clear that she wanted to be someone he could lean on as well without coming off as pushy about it.

Beyond that, she had nothing more to say. However, she still made no move to separate herself from the bird. She just wanted to stay like this for a while... She knew it would have to end eventually and the world would start spinning again, but for now, she intended to enjoy the peace for as long as she could.