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 Ember the Cyndaquil

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54065001



Posts : 3
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Join date : 2019-09-10

Ember the Cyndaquil Empty
PostSubject: Ember the Cyndaquil   Ember the Cyndaquil EmptyTue Sep 10, 2019 4:47 am

» Name: Ember
» Sex: Female
» Species: Cyndaquil #155 - The fire mouse Pokemon
» Affiliation: Traveler

» Level: 5
» Energy: 19
» Ability: Blaze
» Moves
• Tackle (level 1)
• Leer (level 1)
• Quick attack (Egg move)

» Natural Feats: 
•  Flame: All Cyndaquil can release a flame from their back at will which often indicates their mood. 
• Agility: Most Cyndaquil are adept at dodging incoming attacks. 

» Relatives: 
• Blaze - Father (Typhlosion) N/A
• Flash - Mother (Typhlosion) N/A

» Personality: 
Although Ember is usually tends to be a rather quiet Pokémon who doesn’t talk much around strangers, she is actually really intelligent, and is very compassionate for other Pokémon, a trait which she thinks she can put to good use once she finally forms a rescue team, her dream job. She also happens to be a talented cook, using the flame on her back to roast berries she finds, although she doesn’t usually have a chance to show this to others, as she has had most of her meals prepared for her. As some would say, she’s timid, with an inner fire.

» Likes: 
• Consistency: Ember likes having something familiar to cling to in times of big change. This can help keep her from getting too stressed out. 

• Cooking: Ember enjoys cooking berries, especially for others who are in need, such as Pokémon she will be rescuing.

• Studying: Ember is always striving to gain knowledge, whether it’s about history, mathematics, philosophy, or anything else. She also keeps a notebook with information about every species of Pokémon in the area, in case she ends up in a battle. 

» Dislikes:
• Being in the spotlight: Ember hates it when all the focus is on her,  which is one of the the things her best friend Glade helped her out with whenever she was around large groups of Pokémon for the first time. 

• Rain: Ember is a fire type with an open flame on her back. When it rains, it puts out her flame and nullifies her abilities. The same goes for falling into water.

• Jokes: Ember is very serious, and she hates it when others try to relieve tension by trying to be funny. Especially boys. Besides, it doesn’t usually work when they do this. 

» History: Ember was born in a quaint little forested town up in the mountains, the residents consisting of a few small families, giving it the nice cozy feeling you get up in the mountains, if you know what that feels like. Ember spent most of her time studying alone in the local library, rather than battling with the other Pokémon her age, resulting in her distancing from the others over the years. She wasn’t one to take risks, either, which was another reason she spent his time alone, instead of with other Pokémon.  

One day, when at the town’s local library, studying for an upcoming math exam, Ember met a Chikorita named Glade. She was the complete opposite of Ember: a big risk taker, an experienced battler, and not at all afraid to speak her mind, with a witty sense of humour. It was pretty awkward for Ember of them at first, due to her lack of experience with other Pokémon. However, Glade did her best to help Ember loosen up a bit, and really relax, something she had trouble doing. 

Over time, she was able to get to know Glade well enough to be able to really open up to her, as she taught her how to battle properly, take a few risks, and make a few more friends. Ember taught her many of the things she’d learnt,, allowing them to get really close over the years. 

All this changed one faithful day in mid-Winter. It started like any other, with a standard morning at school for Ember. After that, she went to meet up with Glade at the library, just like they did every day. When she got there, though, Glade was carrying a bag full of berries, seeds, and a few other various items. When Ember asked what all the items were for, Glade to told her that she wanted to go exploring with together, giving them much needed time to relax before they started preparing for their exams. 

Things went well at first, the few wild Pokémon they encountered were defeated pretty easily. It was only when a harsh snowstorm came out of nowhere that things started to get bad. The snow made it almost impossible to see, and the wind threatened to blow them off the mountain if they weren’t extremely careful. Ember knew she had to help Glade fast, as her grass-typing made her weak to the environment she was in. Ember tried to use the flame on her back to keep Glade warm, but it wasn’t very helpful out in the open. They had no choice but to find shelter, and it was impossible to find the way back to town with all the wind and snow blocking their vision. Ember managed to carry Glade to a sheltered ledge which was out of the wind, where she tried to keep her warm until either the storm cleared or help arrived. After waiting for hours, fighting a losing battle trying to keep Glade from freezing to death, help finally arrived in the form of a powerful rescue team consisting of a magnezone, a dragonite, and a salamance. The team flew them to a clinic to help the two recover from their injures. When Ember awoke, she wanted to thank the team that saved their lives, but they had already left on another mission. 

Things were never the same between Ember and Glade. When Glade woke up a few weeks after the incident, it turned out she was blinded in the storm, causing her to to be incapable of doing all the things she loved. This was pretty hard on Ember, who, now that they had graduated, was spending as much time as possible helping her friend learn to adapt to her new situation. Even though Glade constantly told Ember that it wasn’t her fault, Ember still blamed herself for her injuries, claiming he didn’t try hard enough to save her. 

Ember never forgot the team that saved them all those years ago, risking their own safety and comfort to save total strangers, with little to gain for themselves. Ember wanted to form her own rescue team, in order to give back to society, and to honour her best friend, who never would be able to. So, once Glade was out of the hospital, and in the care of her family, Ember set out for Grassveil town in hopes of forming a rescue team. 

» Other: Yes, Ember can see clearly. She isn’t actually blind, unlike what some jokes online depict.





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Last edited by 54065001 on Tue Nov 05, 2019 2:28 am; edited 3 times in total
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Solilo
Head Admin
Solilo

Posts : 5018
Poké : 16200
Join date : 2012-07-23
Age : 22
Location : Jabberwock Island

Ember the Cyndaquil Empty
PostSubject: Re: Ember the Cyndaquil   Ember the Cyndaquil EmptyTue Sep 10, 2019 7:44 pm

Sorry, your Character Bio cannot be approved due to the following reasons:


1.) Negative Poke:

Hi and welcome to the site! Unfortunately it seems you have not completely read our site rules, or you have overlooked something when doing so. As such I would implore you to do so before you go any further, as having negative poke is against the rules.
You can read the site rules >>here<< along with other relevant threads on the mechanics and systems we use for RPing here.

2.) Formatting:

Your character bio is not using the correct formatting. It seems you have copied the non-coded version of the template. You can correct this by copying the cyan text in the Character Bio Template located >>here<<

Be sure to read the whole thread for instructions on how to fill in each field correctly.

3.) Not Enough Detail:

Rules breakage and formatting aside, there is not enough detail in your bio for us to get a clear idea of your character. Personality wise, all we know is that he's an introvert who likes to have close friends and is compassionate about others, but this isn't really much to go on. You should also elaborate further on why he likes and dislikes the things he does and what he might have experienced to make that so.

You should take some time to think about how Quil acts in different situations and why he acts that way so that you can comfortably write about them, as this proves to us you'll be able to RP the character we are trying to approve and lets us know if there are any problems we need to help iron out or tips we should give before you begin RPing here.

4.) Species Name:

Along with the species name and number, we ask that you include the 'title' or category that is given to the species. For Cyndaquil it would be #155 Cyndaquil, the Fire Mouse Pokemon.

5.) Energy:

You are correct in that Cyndaquil would have 14 Base Energy but the bio template does not ask for base energy but your character's total energy. This would be the Base Energy plus the character's level. In this case, that would mean 14 + 5, equalling 19 total energy.



There are a few other, smaller problems that I won't cover here yet as I believe that you should completely read the site rules and the bio template instructions before I go any further.


If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to message any of the Character Moderators. May it be through the Chatbox or through Private Messaging, we will tend to your concerns as soon as we can. Please fix your bio accordingly so that we may be able to approve it. Once you have completed your edits, either bump this thread or message us.

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Ember the Cyndaquil P5_sty10

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54065001



Posts : 3
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Join date : 2019-09-10

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PostSubject: Updated Character Application   Ember the Cyndaquil EmptyMon Sep 16, 2019 4:43 pm

Hello. Can an administrator please review this page? I have updated the page according to the given guidelines. Thank you.
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Solilo
Head Admin
Solilo

Posts : 5018
Poké : 16200
Join date : 2012-07-23
Age : 22
Location : Jabberwock Island

Ember the Cyndaquil Empty
PostSubject: Re: Ember the Cyndaquil   Ember the Cyndaquil EmptyMon Sep 16, 2019 6:08 pm

Sorry, your Character Bio cannot be approved due to the following reasons:


1.) Formatting:

Your bio is still not using the correct formatting. As shown in the bio template, each of the main fields should be bolded to allow for easier reading. As I mentioned before, it seems you've copied the non-coded version of the bio template. You can fix this by either copying the cyan text in the Character Bio Template located >>here<< or manually bolding each of the field names.


2.) Personality:

Similarly to the previous time I reviewed your bio, Cinder doesn't seem to have much of a personality beyond being shy and kind. Whilst this is fine, it doesn't make her a very well rounded character and if the 'shy' trait is going to disappear once she evolves as you say here, what does that leave her with? As I said before I would consider how else she acts around different types of pokemon and in different situations. Perhaps read some of the other recently approved bios and consider how Cinder might react to and interact with those characters for inspiration?

Potential things you could consider would be if there is a limit to her kindness, or if there would be anything that would cause her to dislike someone. Whether the answer is yes or no, you should consider what that says about her personality.


3.) Name:

There is already a character on the site with the name Cinder. Since the character is inactive it's not a huge concern if you are really sold on the name and want to keep it, but i'd urge you to consider if you want to share your name with another character should that character happen to become active again, or should someone adopt them. It's unlikely, but still a possibility ^^


4.) Moves:

Not something wrong with the bio specifically, but you are able to pick an egg move alongside the moves Cyndaquil would naturally get from levelling. I'm mentioning it here because you don't have one and that's perfectly fine if you don't want one, but if you do, you still have time to add one in. There's no benefit to deciding not to after all.

If you're concerned about having both the parents be Typhlosion and so don't want to pick one since the egg parent won't match, Typhlosion line parents can still pass on Quick Attack or Double-Edge. Again, it's also perfectly fine if you just don't want either of these and want to stick to just Leer and Tackle.

Speaking of, Leer is misspelled in your bio (as Lear). Not something i'd deny a bio for but might as well mention it.


5.) History:

There's a couple things i need to note about your history but i'll lump them under one heading.

Firstly, you name a location in your history (in this case, the volcano you called Irodenin.) It's fine to have locations not on the site in your history, but we ask that you keep them vague if you do so since it's impossible for your character to visit that specific named location in a thread on the site. For this specific case, you could just change it so that it's a tradition for the Cyndaquil in your character's family to go on a pilgramage to 'a volcano' or 'the nearby volcano' to evolve rather than the specific named volcano. That allows you a bit more freedom to decide it could be a location like Furnace Peak on the site if you want to explore anything to do with it in an actual thread later on.
Alternatively you could just choose to change it to Furnace Peak, or have it be their family's name for Furnace Peak. Any of these solutions would fix the issue.

Secondly, the wording of your history and saying 'all Cyndaquil' makes it seem like every Cyndaquil in existence makes a pilgrimage to this volcano in order to evolve. This would be completely untrue, as there are other characters on the site who may not have heard of such traditions. As such, we would ask that you change that statement to be less of a definite statement about all cyndaquil. For example, you could change it so that it was a tradition of your character's family specifically, or the cyndaquil in the village/place they lived in.


6.) Natural Feats:

You should add a natural feat to the bio for the character's ability.

-*-*-*-

I hope you aren't discouraged by more edits being needed. This version of the bio is a definite improvement over the previous one and I love the idea that Cinder is actively interested in the psychology of other pokemon. It could lead to some interesting interactions with others if perhaps what she believes she knows doesn't match up with who they actually are, and could perhaps even lead into an interest in studying specific other characters. One thing I will say though, don't be afraid to make your character fail or have flaws.

Oh, also! I'm unsure if you are aware but we have a discord server. You'll need to confirm your Discord ID with a staff member on site before you get access to the main part of the server but the link to join is under the quick links bar at the top of the site. It's a good place to find others to do threads with once your character is approved. ^^



If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to message any of the Character Moderators, either through the Chatbox, Discord or through Private Messaging. We will tend to your concerns as soon as we can. Please fix your bio accordingly so that we may be able to approve it. Once you have completed your edits, either bump this thread or message us.

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Ember the Cyndaquil P5_sty10

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54065001



Posts : 3
Poké : 0
Join date : 2019-09-10

Ember the Cyndaquil Empty
PostSubject: Update   Ember the Cyndaquil EmptySun Nov 03, 2019 2:59 am

I’ve re-edited the post, if an admin would like to review it.
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Ember the Cyndaquil Empty
PostSubject: Re: Ember the Cyndaquil   Ember the Cyndaquil Empty

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