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 Jelli the Pyukumuku

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Husbando

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Posts : 1
Poké : 0
Join date : 2017-07-07

PostSubject: Jelli the Pyukumuku   Fri Jul 07, 2017 9:51 pm

» Name: Jelli
» Sex: Female
» Species: #771 Pyukumuku, the Sea Cucumber Pokemon
» Affiliation: Team Backdoor (Unemployed, Homeless)

» Level: 5
» Energy: 22
» Ability: Innards Out
» Moves:
- Baton Pass
- Harden
- Bide
- Helping Hand

» Natural Feats:
- Organ Ejection - Jelli can spit out her digestive system from her mouth at high velocities, which allows her to wrangle it’s targets with it’s highly sticky organs, latching onto them as an attack, or pulling them into her mouth to eat.
- Burn Heal - Jelli’s mucus has a slight healing effect, able to soothe and heal up dry, burnt skin. This allows her mucus to treat things such as sunburns.

» Relatives:
- N/A

» Personality:
Jelli (who prefers to be called Pyukumuku) is extremely dependent on other people. She’s disrespectful and rude, often making tall tales and claims about her abilities, but in the end, she relies on others to back her up. Despite her absolute lack of actually damaging moves, Jelli will always talk like she has a Hyper Beam waiting in her figurative back pocket, like she’s worth the entire world. Her absurdly large ego is only offset by just how much she sucks up to people, as well; the Sea Cucumber Pokemon will ultimately defer to her friends, building up their image so that she looks better next to them. She advertises her friends, enables them, does whatever they tell her to do, so that she ultimately benefits, either by looking good next to them, or reaping the spoils of their victories until they drop. In the end, however, Jelli is surprisingly loyal to her actual friends, and won’t quit on anyone, even if they’ve gone to the bottom of the barrel. She’d risk life and limb (also figuratively, she has no bones,) to keep them safe, prioritizing their health over her own ego. ...Make no mistake, she’s still terrible in every other aspect.

» Likes: Herself, Pebe, Spicy Food, Money, Glutting Out, Mud Baths, Campfires, Freeform Jazz

» Dislikes: Solo Battling, Hero-types, Heights, Philosophy, Scheduled Appointments, Flying Pokemon

» History:
Pyukumuku don’t really have families. They’re born when a large group of Pyukumukus herd together, releasing the necessaries to make eggs which float off into the sea. As such, Jelli herself didn’t have a family. She was raised by instinct and the wild, wandering the great big ocean, making her home on a beach side she didn’t know the name of. Living there for most of her early life peacefully, Jelli’s beach was suddenly attacked by a giant dragon Pokemon, the sound of clanging scales being the only thing that she remembers of the event. Jelli retreated, crawling from the beach onto land for safety, wandering the vast wilderness lost and alone. However, this changed when she met Pebe! Now with her friend protecting her, the two of them formed Team Backdoor, their name for their wandering duo. Traveling about, causing trouble, and generally having a great time without adult supervision, the two kids continued to wander the land, eager to make a name for themselves as the biggest, baddest Pokemon team of all time. ...Or, at least, act like it.

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Lord E V
Head Secretary & Lord of the Eevees
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Posts : 3204
Poké : 853
Join date : 2014-07-12
Age : 21
Location : Nibiru

PostSubject: Re: Jelli the Pyukumuku   Thu Jul 13, 2017 2:19 am

Sorry, your Character Bio cannot be approved due to the following reasons:


1.) MOVES

List the level or manner through which each move was learned.  Also, note that you can have one egg move.


2.) NATURAL FEATS

The feat for organ ejection actually doesn't say that pyukumuku ejects its digestive system in specific.  Rather, it just says "internal organs."  It also doesn't say anything about its organs being particularly sticky.  You also need to add a feat for your character's ability, which is effectively just a pyukumuku using its organ ejection as a last-ditch effort to attack.

3.) PERSONALITY

Why does your character prefer to be called by her species rather than her name?  There appears to be no reason for this, and it is by no means normal.  It needs an explanation.

4.) LIKES/DISLIKES

Describe why your character likes and dislikes each thing on the list.  At least a sentence each is required.  Also, advanced instruments don't exist here, so she couldn't like freeform jazz.

5.) HISTORY

Where did you get that pyukumuku "don't really have families?"  You just kinda made that up, and it is certainly not supported by this site.  Aside from that, what was the "dragon" in question that attacked her beach, and why did it do so?  And last but certainly not least, your character appears to have had no family nor friends until meeting Pebe; she literally had no social interaction whatsoever, which would make her entirely wild.  How could she possibly be civilized enough to even hold a conversation, let alone befriend someone and go on adventures into the civilized world with them?  This entire history seems rushed and sloppy, like a means to an end.

6.) AQUATIC SPECIES

Pyukumuku are an aquatic species.  They dry out if they are away from water for 10 days.  So, unless your character constantly stays near bodies of water, she would die on land.  She would be limited on where she can go regardless, at least without someone with the ability to hydrate her around.


If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to message any of the Secretaries. May it be through the Chatbox or through Private Messaging, we will tend to your concerns as soon as we can. Please fix your bio accordingly so that we may be able to approve it. Once you have completed your edits, either bump this thread or message us.

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